The Lies We Believe: Love = Acceptance

What we believe to be true about ourselves and the world around us shapes our future. This month, I'm exploring the lies we believe: about ourselves; about others; about the world - and how these lies impact us and our relationships.

Last week we talked about the lie of control and how holding on and attempting to take over is how we push away the very thing that is meant for us.

This week, we’ll skim the surface about love and acceptance. Because, you know, I’m keeping it light.

I have always been fascinated by love. Romantic love, the love we have for our children, our pets – the things we love – all of it. As well as the spiritual nature of love, meaning, the love that simply is (noun) vs. the the love we, as humans, carry out here on this earth (verb).

I'm also fascinated by our brokenness that prevents us from experiencing the love we so deeply crave. 

Love is sometimes something you do - AND love is also something that is. You can act in a loving way, but doing so without accepting the true spiritual nature of love,  can border on the edge of self-serving - which is inadvertently, unloving.

In other words:

Love is not earned –  it is free for the giving and receiving. You are worthy of love simply because you exist.  No amount of working, not working, achievement or designation will change this. 

But sometimes we confuse others acceptance of us with love. 

So many of us have been taught (and believed) that our ability – dare I say our worthiness -  to be loved comes from outside of ourselves. So many of us believe we’re only worthy of love if we say the right thing, do the right thing, be the right thing. And, of course that ‘right thing’ differs depending on background, experience, or sometimes even another person’s mood. We are all guilty of sending and believing this message, I am guilty too.

At our core, we are so scared of each other's differences. If you are different it might mean I am wrong and therefore unworthy of being loved. 

This thinking creates an environment of fear. 

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

Wounds from our past contribute to this way of thinking and they impact our ability to give, receive, and walk in the power of love. Our wounds tell us we are unlovable. 

We can dig in and discover what's really going on in our hearts,  and let go of what keeps us from the very thing we crave so deeply. That's what I'm  inviting you to do here at Unchained. 

I am not afraid. To grow.  To learn. To do it differently each day, so I can add life to those around me.                                                                                                 

You can too.

This is how we make it great.