In my house there is an ugly green couch. It was given to me by a friend when I was in the middle of divorce and in the process of a considerable downsize. I was literally cutting my square footage of living space in half and walking away from large spaces in favor of smaller, more manageable ones. The oversized furniture it took to fill up my old space was never going to work in this new place. Sometimes a purge is necessary – sometimes you should not adorn your new surroundings with your old materials.
My friend had this small couch – a loveseat really that fit my space perfectly. It wasn’t the prettiest of pieces and not the most comfortable – but it fit, and at the time, that was all that really mattered. I was grateful to save the $600 or whatever it took to buy something new on top of the rest of the moving expenses I was already taking on.
I am a small person and the couch fits me perfectly. Immediately, it was deemed my spot in the house. Four years later, I still have this couch. It’s where I do most of my thinking and a lot of my writing. It still fits me, but I must admit, it’s getting a little uncomfortable - it might be time for a change.
I am on the cliff of a transition – a transformation, really. In that a transition is a shift in external circumstances while a transformation is a shift of your insides.
Transformation happens when your thoughts, actions, attitudes, and beliefs are all up for grabs. Transformation occurs when you take these things – hold them openly and say to yourself and God, what do I need to keep here? What can be thrown away? It’s a cleaning out of your internal closets.
This doesn’t take any physical work really – not in the traditional sense anyway. The only real requirement is to let go and let the universe do its thing.
When it is over, I am different somehow – maybe not different really, but I know I’ve just stepped into more of who I am – of who I was created to be. I’m less of what the world or others believe I should be.
With each iteration of transformation, I wrestle with the questions:
How can I do this?
Who will love me when I’m fully me?
Who will love me if I am not afraid?
I toy with these over and over, all the while knowing that I do not really have a choice – because denying myself of me is not an option anymore.
The battle of course is in the unknown.
We fear what we do not understand. This part of basic human nature does not change until we have made some sort of personal evolution.
For me, right now, the question is ‘how much am I willing to risk on myself? How much am I willing to believe in me?’
There comes a time – a pivotal point in every person’s journey when destiny comes knocking at your door. This could revolve around anything really; a career choice, a relational choice, a choice to stand up for yourself.
It is in this moment, you ask,
how can I do this?
which is followed by the still, small voice that states simply,
how can I not do this?
Because the truth is with that decision, in a moment, everything will change.
Some for the better and some for what will seem like the worse – but always for the good. Because decisions like this help you earn your power back, they help you own your own truth and there is nothing bad or wrong about your truth. The truth might be hard – it might be cumbersome and unwieldy – but it is not bad.
No– the truth will indeed set us free.
Here's to making it great.