I couldn’t do it anymore.
What do you want to do?
I don’t want to pick up his pieces any longer – I don’t want to continue to clean up the mess from his bad decisions. But I also don’t want to hurt him – and I know he’ll be very hurt (and angry) if I stop.
I didn’t think I should knowingly do things that would disappoint my husband, but instead go along to get along. Values that were taught in my family – they were taught in my church, taught in my community. Peacekeeping was valued over peacemaking and real, authentic relationship.
Yes, he will be hurt – and he’ll feel like you’re abandoning him.
Well, aren’t I?
Yes, you will be essentially.
But the real crime was that I abandoned myself many years prior.