My Dirty Little Secrets
I was losing it all: Bankrupt with three small children. In a dead marriage; just going through the motions.
A lost business, a lost marriage, a lost home - I had lost myself and I was losing my shit.
50 pounds overweight, out of shape, out of sorts. Everything was falling apart.
If you saw me from the outside, you would hardly notice: "We were great!" But I was the great pretender. Turmoil and dysfunction were my dirty little secrets.
How had this happened? How had I gone from a bright, personable, college-educated and fully-capable woman to ending up in a such a vulnerable and precarious situation?
How did I become so unhappy? Did I even know what happiness was?
Around this time, I had a dream. I was watching my young self, about 7 or 8, riding in the backseat of a car. There were thick, heavy metal chains wrapped tightly all around me –I couldn’t move. A confusing, chaotic, and somewhat scary childhood bound that girl. I knew I had to get her unchained. So many of us are walking around all wrapped up and we don’t even notice – or we’re too scared to admit it.
So, I set out on a journey of self-discovery – a journey that continues today and one for which I will be forever grateful.
The Journey: Unchained
This journey is messy and it is sometimes brutal - filled with tough love and hard (very hard) choices. But it is also full of more joy, love, and hope than I could have ever imagined. This is not your Facebook life. This is a life filled with a million beautiful messes.
Today, I'm living a life unchained - free from denial and the pain of my past. Free from the expectations of the world and from others. A life empowered by a growing level of emotional intelligence, truth, and vulnerability. I’ve never been happier.
This path is available to all, but it's not for everyone - it takes bravery, it takes courage. But, if this is the path you choose, the results will be well worth it– I promise!